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I Was a Poem

from -​-​if ever you should by cllctyrslf

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lyrics

All I can think is your hands on your hips, and your arms are angled off to the sides.
And he walks up behind you, pushes hands through the holes,
and wraps his whole weight around you.
So hands won't stop flinching, and voice won't stop shaking,
and I probably waste my time, writing and thinking
that somewhere along this line, I might start getting better.

Some solace, i guess, is you're frenetic and always afraid,
and I still can't breathe when I see you.
And I feel nothing for how this is, this relentless distance,
it's about the same as space, it comes and goes in waves,
and I'm still not sure how we grew apart, with effort, but effortless.

All I can think is his hands on your hips, and your tongue and his lips,
and you're laughing and visibly making some conscious effort to pull away.
Cause you hold yourself, a contortionist, hiding herself in plain sight,
you're a sculpture or otherwise, practiced at moving on, detracting and breathing.

Some malice persists, and I'm trying to let things go,
and to let people move and to fix themselves.
but it's borderline Hate cause it's borderline Love.
And I was a poem, and you were a blue paper crane,
hanging from the ceiling in my room, on a thin white thread,
and you swell until you burst and bloom.
And I'm only bitter that you are feeling better as of distance,
and as of space.
and I think it's cancer, and I was a liar,
but either way, you're happy as of late.
And I wrote love songs after sad songs after waiting for the candle flames
to spill little pins, I'm happy you're happy,
even if it's easier without me.

And I guess it might just have surprised me
how you really didn't miss us at all.

credits

from -​-​if ever you should, released August 26, 2014
Acoustic Guitars, Bass, Drums, Melodica, Vocals

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cllctyrslf Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

post-emo // pop //
-core band from philadelphia

for booking:
cllctyrslf@gmail.com

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